I've recently re watched Bad Moms Christmas, and even though it's utterly cringey, it's great and just like the first movie, it's actually pretty relatable! It's all about how we all have these high expectations or extraordinary promises and traditions to live up to, and let's be frank here - as mums, we are expected to do a lot at Christmas - and Christmas overwhelm sucks.
Not just mums, but parents in general put so much pressure on themselves, to give their children the 'perfect' Christmas each year, and it's utterly exhausting. With the popularity of social media nowadays, the pressure is more than it used to be even a few years ago! We're expected to decorate our entire homes, welcome the elf onto our shelves, desperately trying to ensure the season is magical for your children, search and overspend on matching family Christmas pyjamas, plan and overspend on gifts for everyone we know, wrap every single gift (beautifully and expertly I might add!), write 1000 cards which includes your child's friends as they unenthusiastically give up after 5, ensure your children occupy every waking minute with some sort of Christmas themed activity, planning the Christmas food, buying the Christmas food, desperately trying to find space to put away the Christmas food - the list is absolutely endless.
I don't want you to get me wrong, I'm no Grinch! I love everything about Christmas, but the weeks building up to it, there just constantly seems to be 100 things you need to do every day!
So today I wanted to share with you a few suggestions, to ensure you don't completely overwhelm yourself or put too much pressure on yourself this year, so you actually can enjoy the festive season yourself!
Ditch Traditions You Don't Enjoy
Many of the traditions we do with our family are actually ones we used to do when we were children! Some were really special and you continue to do them with your children, and that's ok if you all have fun doing it - like leaving a mince pie and a glass of milk out for Father Christmas (I used to love waking up on Christmas morning and rushing into the kitchen to see if he had eaten it!) So I do repeat this tradition with my children! However, when I was little I used to wake up on Christmas morning, drag my stocking from the end of my bed and hop into my parents' bed to unwrap it all! I absolutely loved it at the time, but this is something that just doesn't work for us as a family, so we simply don't do it! (My children do not stay in their beds, so it wouldn't work!). What I'm trying to say is, you absolutely do not have to repeat traditions just because you did them when you were little. Do what works for your family.
Other traditions you can ditch are ones that cost too much for your budget! If it stresses you out spending too much on it each year, don't do it! Buying new matching pyjamas each year is absolutely lovely don't get me wrong, if you can afford it. If you can't afford to visit an extravagant Santa experience every year, don't do it!
Lastly, ditch the traditions that stress you out! If you absolutely dread doing a particular tradition each year, don't pressure yourself to do it! If you hate having to come up with ideas for the Elf on the Shelf each night, and having to clean it up again in the morning - say bye bye to him! If you hate having to write 1000 Christmas cards, don't do it! Don't pressure yourself to do absolutely everything each year.
Create New Traditions You Love
Now you've decided which traditions you don't love, why not make some new traditions that fit your family. Remember that you are an adult, you are the parent. You can do what you want over the holidays. If you don't want a big roast dinner, don't cook it! If you don't want to go anywhere for Christmas, stay at home! If it's what you want, then go for it. Talk to your close family members and decide what are your favourite parts of Christmas, or what they'd like to do instead. Create your own traditions, it'll make them that much more special and everyone will look forward to them!
Stick To A Budget
Back to the point of not overstretching your budget. If you find yourself spending too much on gifts, plan and stick to a budget. Don't go on a massive shopping spree to buy everyone's gifts, have a think about what sort of things each person might like and ensure you have a budget in mind per person. Me personally, I have a certain amount I spend on my children, another amount for my husband, another amount for my parents, another amount for my siblings etc. I do it every year and it helps to know exactly what I have to spend.
Allocate Jobs
Just remember, just because you're the mum, doesn't mean you physically have to do it all yourself. Allocate jobs for other family members to do (my husband cooks the Christmas dinner every year), if your children can write their cards, leave them to it, let someone else pick up the food shop, accept that invitation for Christmas dinner at someone else's house this year! Let and encourage others to help you out!
Stop Trying To Be Perfect
So you didn't create the perfect festive outdoor display? You didn't pick the most extravagant or expensive gift, but went with a classic you know the recipient will like? You didn't buy toy/book advent calendars and stuck to good old Cadbury? Perhaps you didn't hand make reindeer food or get your children to decorate Christmas cards? Does any of it really matter? I know, looking at social media it seems everyone else has got their act together apart from you, but that's simply not true. We all like to portray to others that we can do it all, make everything perfect for Christmas but we can't, and we don't. Let go of that perfect Christmas idea, put things into perspective. Give yourself a break and enjoy the moment with your loved ones.
Schedule Time For YOU
Speaking of giving yourself a break, make sure you make time for you, no matter what it takes. Tell your partner what you are doing and when so you won't forget, schedule it in your diary if needs be! (I do, there's no shame in it! It's far more likely to get done that way!) You deserve time out to rest, recharge, eat Christmas chocolate and binge watch festive movies if that's what you fancy. How can you feel Christmassy or be able to spread Christmas cheer if you're totally knackered? Take care of you!
I guess the main things to take from this post are, make it work for you all as a family, it doesn't have to be perfect, nobody is perfect, and lastly, make yourself a priority too!
Wishing you a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year! xx
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